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Supporting Your Continued Growth!

Yesterday I posted the first five out of 10 Personal growth questions that have made a difference in my life. Here is part two, the next five questions out of 10. I hope they support you as much as they have supported me.

6. What motivates me?

Motivation is what gets us in action, action is what creates results. Ask the question, what motivates me? Then observe your life. When you accomplish something, identify what is that motivated you to accomplish it. Watch when you get excited, what are you feeling excited about, that’s motivation. If you discover the answer to this question you are well on your way to creating a life you love.

7. What do I value most?

Your values are the essence of who you are. Getting clear about them and living them is a guaranteed way to be the fullest most authentic expression of yourself.

8. What do I really want?

Yes I know this question might seem trite, but how many times do you actually stop and ask yourself this question and then really listen to the answers. The funny thing is, in each moment this question can generate completely different answers.

So, start asking this question, stop and really listen to the answer, and then identify small step towards getting it. You are worth it.

9. What do I appreciate most about myself?

This question is essential for creating a life you love. It’s very challenging to love your life when you can’t identify anything you appreciate about yourself. And I’m convinced the only reason that you couldn’t find things you appreciate about yourself is you haven’t had enough practice. So start practicing today!

10. What am I grateful for?

If you want to live your best possible life, if you want to be all that you can be, or if you just want to be happier in any moment, asked this question as often as you can remember. When you’re in the process of being grateful you can’t help but feeling good.

Why ask questions?

Questioning myself is the easiest way I have found to find truth in my life. This is because we are the only ones that can say what is true for us. So ask questions and never stop asking. Listen to the answers and trust they are true for you. Then start taking actions that move you closer and closer to your truth. This process will guarantee your continued growth into the fullest most authentic expression of you.

Prepare to Grow!

You’ve probably heard the saying, “Be All You Can Be”. The Army may not be the place you want to Be All You Can Be, but for most of us, we truly want to grow into the fullest most authentic expression of ourselves. The question then becomes, how– how do I get to the point of being all that I can be? I mostly see myself as truly content with my life– happy with the way things are going, but I also know that I’m far from Buddha and I’m sure that my life can be more wonderful than it is in any given moment.

Do you seek personal growth and spiritual development skills that would bring more meaning to your life– something a bit more important than your day-to-day activities?

I don’t know about you, but when I get entrenched in the details of my life it seems challenging to step back and ask: “Am I being all that I can be?. For this reason I’m always looking for ways to interrupt the day-to-day routine and create more of what I want in life. They say you can’t teach an old dog new tricks… or can you?

Here Are 5 Of The 10 Questions I Came Up With To Help This Old Dog Be All She Can Be.

1. Am I happy in this moment?

Anytime is a great time to ask this question, because each moment added up becomes your life! Check in as often as you can remember.

If the answer is yes, celebrate! But if the answer is no, find something in that moment will make you happier than you are right then.

2. Am I comfortable with the direction my life is headed?

The one thing you can count on in life is change. Because our lives are always shifting and changing it’s important to stay conscious about the direction it’s going. Check in with yourself. Ask, am I comfortable with this course my life is taking. Remember, its never too late to adjust course. Every small adjustment is a conscious choice in creating a life you want– instead of the life that just happens to you.

3. Is there anything about me, that if changed, would dramatically enhance my life?

This is the kind of question that many of us might have trouble with. Guilt, sadness, or regret might come up in the process of asking yourself this kind of question. But just like I said before, change is inevitable and if were lucky in the process of our own personal changes we consciously choose what would enhance our lives.

So every once in awhile take an honest self inventory of your habitual behaviors and choices. Try not to beat yourself up if you find things you would like change. Then get very clear about how you want to be instead and start practicing.

4. What do I believe is possible for my life?

It has been said, that we can only have what we believe is possible. Check-in, this question will give you amazing insights on what is in your way of you getting what you want.

5. What’s most important to me?

Unless you know what’s important to you, it’s almost impossible to get it. Make a list and make sure you spend some time focusing in each of these areas of your life.

Yes You Can Teach An Old Dog New Tricks

These may seem like simple questions, but the answers can be profound. Asking them, listening to the answers and taking action, has helped this puppy to be all that she can be.

Spend some time asking yourself these questions. Be with them, write down what occurs to you. Next right down any actions you want to take in relation to the answers you came up with.

click here for Part Two–the next 5 of 10 Personal Growth Questions That Make a Difference.

until next then.

live, love and laugh,

Beth

A Preference, not a Judgment

In my last post I went off a little bit on “moralistic dogmatism” and I’d like to make sure that you were left with the wrong impression. You see, I’m not against moralistic dogmatism. I just found that moralistic dogmatism didn’t seem to work very well as a tool for creating the kind of life or the kind of world I want to experience.

Coming of age in the late 60s I found myself drawn to the anti-this an anti-that movements. It made sense to me to be against war, poverty, the military-industrial complex, fascism, and well, all of those things that me and my buddies were so righteously indignant about.

What You Focus Your Attention on Grows

It took me a little while, and reading a number of books, to get the idea that “what you resist persists.” But one thing that really helped this hit home was when I heard a guy named Marshall Rosenberg sing a song about how “you can’t do it don’t.”

I started listening for how often people express themselves in the negative: what they don’t want, what they’re against, what they don’t like, what they want to make stop, etc.

To put a fine point on it, Rosenberg then tells a story about a woman who’s tired of spending nights home alone while the husband works late. So she screws up her courage and tells him in her best ultimatum voice, “I don’t want you staying so late at the office!” So what does he do? He joins a bowling league.

That’s the problem with having your attention focused on what you don’t want. If you’re not clear about what you do want, it leaves the door wide open for other things that you don’t want to wander in.

Now, one of the things I’ve figured out along the way is that people are totally self-serving. That’s not a judgment, it’s actually a result of our genetic coding to make sure that we get everything we need to survive, thrive, and multiply. And doesn’t it make sense that that’s more likely to happen if you are moving toward what you do want rather than pushing against what you don’t?

Be For What You Want and Against Nothing

So at this point I’m “for” being “for,” but not “against” being “against.” I find that every time I start to react to something that I don’t like or don’t want, the faster I can get clear about what I do want instead, the easier it is for me to get it, and the more fun I have in the process.

This practice, turning my don’t want to do once, has allowed me to hone in on picking which things I am going to “test” to see whether or not they are something I’d like to “hold to firmly.” And I’m finding more and more things that I like all the time.

Committed to Your Success,

Neill Gibson

I’m glad you found us!

A Brief Personal Introduction.

I’m Beth Banning and I’d like to tell you little bit more about myself and why I’m willing to sit in front of my computer exploring the world via the Internet and write these blog posts. I love it, that’s why. I have found this to be one amazing way to investigate new things, develop my own personal understandings, and to share what I know with others.

I am a student of life. Always have been and always will be. My passion is people. I just love us! We are extraordinary, diverse magnificent beings. I’m very curious and interested in our behaviors, motivations and our interactions with one another. This is been true for me as long as I can remember.

The Road I’ve Traveled.

I clearly remember the moment that I decided there was something missing for me in the way people interacted with each other. It was in junior high school during a riot. In those days, sadly, riots were commonplace. I watched my younger brother being pushed down the stairs. This was a terrifying moment for me and also a turning point in my life. I began questioning… What is causing this? Why is everyone so angry? and my questioning has continued to this day.

Because I love people, learning and experiencing life. And I love sharing, giving and contributing anything I can to others, I have made this my life’s work. So in this blog, I will offer understandings that Neil and I have developed, I will offer practical strategies that I have personally used to create a life I love and because I continue to search I will also offer new and useful tips that I find along the way.

My Commitment To You

I offer all of this with love and to support you in boldly exploring your life, consciously choose what works best for you, and live your life authentically and with integrity for the highest good of all concerned. I believe with all my heart, if each of us take 100% responsibility for creating the life we desire, the world will be transformed from one of eat or be eaten to a world that works for everyone. Where we as human beings can live our true nature– where the joy of contributing to each other flourishes and no one goes without. I am here for you.

With love and appreciation for who you are and what you contribute to the world,

Beth

To expand on my introduction in our first post a little bit…

As long as I can remember I’ve been a “seeker of truth.” I’ve explored many different ideas, philosophies and religions on my journey down this path. And, while I am no by no means a scholar of world religions, I’ve dipped my toe into the waters of most far Eastern, Middle Eastern and Western religions, as well as a number of the esoteric and mystical traditions.

At one point in my past I was quite involved in the Full-Gospel / Charismatic / Fundamental Christian religion, even holding the post of Chairman of the Deacons. But at this point I would probably describe myself as another “spiritual but not religious” type (to help further overuse that now almost trite “personal profile” description.)

On my journey I’ve practiced what we quoted Buddha as saying: “Do not believe in anything simply because you have heard it…” Though, I first heard it articulated in Paul’s First Letter to the Thessalonians, where he tells us to: “Test all things, and hold firmly that which is good.”

Exploring the definition of “good” hastened my departure from the “religious” practice of Christianity as it is exercised today. My exodus came about primarily as a result of the religious reliance on moralistic dogmatism as a way to control the flock, rather than teaching people to depend on that “indwelling spirit” which is able to practice the discrimination that both Buddha and Paul talk about.

So, my journey in large part has been about developing my personal ability to discern the difference between what I’ve been taught and what I can discern as true from myself. And to be able to hear the still, small voice inside that knows this difference, in spite of the roar of those who claim authority.

This has been my quest to discover and hold fast to what I can know as true.

So how does all of this “abstract analysis of the global picture” relate to a New Age Self-Help blog?

I am immensely grateful for what I’ve discovered along this path, and the amazing differences these things have made in my life. My desire to contribute these insights and understandings to others is what leads me to express them in ways that can help others develop the practical skills they need to create lasting transformation in their lives.

I’ve come to believe that this quality of transformation in a person’s life requires a fundamental shift in thinking from the moralistic dogmatism that is in the “air” which most people breathe in and out every day. This kind of “right/wrong”, “good/bad” thinking is the foundation that supports our culture’s belief in scarcity, domination and its practice of “survival of the fittest.” It is the cause of most of what’s least fun for people in the world today.

I think it will be the dawning of a New Age when people learn to throw off the mental shackles of our cultural heritage by learning to think for themselves, as Buddha and Paul suggest. It seems to me that this is an “inside job.” No one else can make a person do the “observation and analysis” necessary to “test all things.” This is a Self-Help journey.

My commitment is to support your success in moving father down your path, wherever your still, small voice may lead you. This New Age Self-Help blog is the latest addition to the tools we’ve created to help you do that. I hope this effort supports your success and I hope to hear your suggestions about the ways it could do that, the ways that it does, and the ways it doesn’t.

Committed to Your Success,

Neill Gibson

Welcome to the first of many New Age Self-Help blog posts. Our goal in this blog is to provide you with personal growth and professional development skills and techniques to help you improve relationships, increase self-esteem, support full self expression, relieve stress and reduce anger so you can lead a happy and more satisfying life.

In this post, we’d like to take the time to introduce ourselves and give you an idea of what’s important to us about these topics.

We are Beth Banning and Neill Gibson and we will both be writing posts. We each have very different styles of writing and thinking. So even though we usually end up in similar places, the roads we travel to get there can be quite different.

Neill is more analytical, abstract and typically a global-big picture kind-of-guy. Beth is more linear and typically uses more everyday language, and is definitely a glass-half-full kind of gal.

As we said in the About Us section of our blog, we believe that the shortest path to a happy life is found through conscious choice. Our mission is to play a significant role in supporting the global evolution toward greater consciousness that supports a shift from the belief in scarcity, domination and “the survival of the fittest,” to a global culture that embraces the values of abundance, prosperity and inter-reliance–one that promotes “the evolution of everyone.”

We are confident that the most effective way for this shift to happen is one relationship at a time, beginning with the relationship we have with ourselves and then extending that shift out to the people in our lives.

Our vision for this blog is to share with you what we’ve learned along our journey. Our desire is to support you in the process.

You may find some of the information we offer in our blog will be familiar to you, while some will seem radically different than what you’ve learned in the past. You’ll probably agree with some of our opinions, be shocked by others, hopefully inspired by many, and possibly even irritated by a few.

As Buddha said:

“Do not believe in anything simply because you have heard it. Do not believe in traditions because they have been handed down for many generations. Do not believe anything because it is spoken and rumored by many. Do not believe in anything because it is written in your religious books. Do not believe in anything merely on the authority of your teachers and elders. But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and the benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it.”

Whatever your reaction or response, our goal is to offer ideas that promote conscious conversation, inspire conscious action and to create a more conscious world. We look forward to your comments and questions, and the opportunity to support you in your personal evolution and your ability to create more happiness in your life and your world.

With Love and a Commitment to Your Success,

Beth and Neill