When Does 50 Plus 50 Still Equal 50?
Do you want your relationships to be fair–where everyone does their part and shares in the benefits equally? Have you ever heard it said that for a relationship to work, it has to be 50/50
Many people today believe the myth that happiness and satisfaction come from 50/50 relationships. In these relationships, people contribute equally– each doing their 50%– to make them work. You can spot people who believe this myth in all kinds of relationships: between friends, romantic partners, family members and business colleagues. Belief in this myth is a major reason why people find themselves dissatisfied and frustrated about their relationships.
Why? Because if we expect the other person to do their 50% and they don’t do it, we’re disappointed and upset. As soon as one person starts keeping score to make sure the other person is doing their 50%, it becomes very difficult to have a relationship that’s happy and satisfying.
We suggest that you stop spending your time making sure the other person is completing their 50% and instead, start being 100% responsible for your happiness and satisfaction in the relationship.
We know this is a radical idea, but when we pass on the responsibility for our satisfaction and control of our feelings to anyone or anything “out there”, we limit our power and the possibilities for our happiness. We may want to be happy, but we’ve put our happiness in the hands of other people.
Being 100% responsible means you never give up, and never give in on anything that is important to you. If something is missing in your relationship, what can you do to make sure you get it? If something’s happening in your relationship you don’t like, what can you do to change how it’s happening?
Don’t ever leave your ability to have a satisfying relationship in anyone else’s hands. If true happiness in all your relationships is what you’re looking for, start creating 100% relationships with yourself and others today.
This week… Any time you notice yourself checking whether the other person is doing their 50%, stop and identify what’s happening now that you’re not enjoying, what it is that you do want to happen, and figure out one thing you can do to start experiencing what you want.
Remember, the shortest path to a happy life is found through conscious choice.
We would love to hear from you, what do you think creates a great relationship?